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#1 28/7/09 13:28

Leus
Member

Oni Joint Story, First Installment: Salvation

I thought this would be fun.  I'm going to write a few paragraphs of a story set in the Oni universe and then leave it open for others to continue.  Of course, I'll come back and write more sections later.  Here's how this should work:

You read the story so far.  If you decide you're going to write the next part, please immediately make a post indicating your intent before you start writing.  Just a little something like...

"I'm writing the next part..."

I encourage this because I think it would be disheartening if you wrote an epic and eloquent elaboration to this story only to find after you post it that someone else posted their own extrapolation beforehand and took the story in a completely different direction, invalidating all the hard work you just did.  And for this reason, of course, make sure to refresh the page after you claim you'll be writing the next part to make sure nobody else claimed it before you.  I doubt we'll get enough writers for that to really be a danger, but it's always better to be safe I think.

Finally, if you claim that you'll be writing the next part, please do it in a timely manner and post it up because if you make a post claiming you'll be writing but then don't end up posting anything, you'll put the entire process on hold.

Hopefully this garners some interest.  I'll be posting the first part in a few seconds.  I'm intentionally leaving it pretty open-ended, so feel free to let your creativity run wild.

Last edited by Leus (7/10/09 12:25)


If we don't change the direction we're going, we'll likely end up where we're headed.

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#2 28/7/09 13:29

Leus
Member

Re: Oni Joint Story, First Installment: Salvation

Oni Joint Story, First Installment:  Salvation

The rhythmic clip-clop of her shoes pounding the ground resonated throughout the hallways of the mountain compound as Konoko dashed for the exit.  She had overridden some crucial executables in the programs used to maintain the activities of all the major atmospheric processors in this sector, and she knew this would cause the systems to overload.  Assuming this could entail anything from a fading hum to a violent explosion, Konoko didn't care to stick around and witness the outcome firsthand.

She began to worry; this compound was huge.

Eventually she'd put what she considered to be a safe distance between her and the failing facility.  She stopped to catch her breath, leaning on her knees and crouching slightly.  She couldn't remember the last time she'd been breathing this heavily or rapidly.  After a few minutes she checked her pulse and found that her heart rate was holding steady at this elevated pace.  She also realized that, despite the physical signs, she was not in the least bit tired.

"Great," she said aloud to herself and realizing as she heard her own voice speak that she was finally acknowledging just how truly alone she now was.  "The chrysalis..." she trailed off.  Her body had been altered so severely that her heart now needed to pump harder and faster to support the new growth and strength.  Undoubtedly her heart itself had grown and become stronger as well.  She'd have to get used to breathing this way; at this thought she furrowed her brow, imagining the air she'd soon be gasping down once the failure of the atmospheric processors began to take effect.  This also brought her back to the matter at hand.  Sighing, she continued her expository monologue.

"What do I do now?" she asked the dying air.  "Everyone I know with intimate information regarding this daodan project is dead.  Kerr, Griffin, Muro, my father..." she paused, her eyes lighting up with a distant and fleeting hope.  "My father..." she repeated.  "Kerr said..."  At this, she dropped her one-sided conversation and began dashing once more.  She had to learn the truth and find out if there really was still hope.

Last edited by Leus (4/10/09 7:28)


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#3 1/8/09 13:16

Leus
Member

Re: Oni Joint Story, First Installment: Salvation

Aw.  I thought people would be into this.


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#4 1/8/09 13:49

Lithium
Member

Re: Oni Joint Story, First Installment: Salvation

no not really. or maybe some people dont have time, arent interested and cant think of anything to put here. which is my problem.  neutral

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#5 1/8/09 14:03

3llense'g
Member

Re: Oni Joint Story, First Installment: Salvation

I just forgot. Maybe tomorrow. big_smile


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#6 2/8/09 12:00

Lithium
Member

Re: Oni Joint Story, First Installment: Salvation

well i dont wanna ruin ur good story you have up there cuz it might go into some bad ideas. like im really interested in what you were gonna say next

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#7 2/8/09 13:17

adorage
Member

Re: Oni Joint Story, First Installment: Salvation

I like the idea but couldn't come up with anything too.


You're all like... like big fat failure turtles!

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#8 2/8/09 13:21

Lithium
Member

Re: Oni Joint Story, First Installment: Salvation

yes i was going to write something then i saw his whole father thing and decided to wait and see if anyone uts up anything that could make sense with it. Like maybe since his father created it. Then muro must have some files hidden in the facility.

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#9 2/8/09 17:09

Ire Yosuke
Member

Re: Oni Joint Story, First Installment: Salvation

Well I don't like writting about Konoko. She did what she did and she's a hero but give others a chance.

1. Barabas. Was he human before?
2. Mukade. Technology maniac or neccessity.

Plenty of other ideas :3


"There are two things that cannot be ignored in life. One is a cannon, the other, a cannon ball." - Commander Patrick "Bombard" Bomba

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#10 2/8/09 23:50

Lithium
Member

Re: Oni Joint Story, First Installment: Salvation

like maybe barabas earned his chrysallis. and mukade IDK

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#11 3/8/09 9:48

Leus
Member

Re: Oni Joint Story, First Installment: Salvation

It doesn't have to be all about Konoko.  Stories shift perspective all the time.  Feel free to write about anyone else you want.


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#12 4/8/09 9:11

dream996
Member

Re: Oni Joint Story, First Installment: Salvation

i don't really think anyone would really waste the time on this


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#13 4/8/09 10:17

Leus
Member

Re: Oni Joint Story, First Installment: Salvation

Lol damn.


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#14 4/8/09 10:24

paradox-01
Member

Re: Oni Joint Story, First Installment: Salvation

@ dream: Writing is a hobby, also is modding, drawing and playing games, or visiting the forums. Welcome and waste time with us. :eyeroll:

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#15 4/8/09 10:31

dream996
Member

Re: Oni Joint Story, First Installment: Salvation

i know is a hobby and i love writing too but in my personal opinion i would say oni's story is too hard to edit or write  tongue


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#16 4/8/09 10:41

love_Oni
Member

Re: Oni Joint Story, First Installment: Salvation

paradox-01 wrote:

@ dream: Writing is a hobby, also is modding, drawing and playing games, or visiting the forums. Welcome and waste time with us. :eyeroll:

Off topic: So which working is not waste time like writing. modding, or playing games...? Studying?  big_smile


The Boy Who Knew Too Much tongue

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#17 16/8/09 11:28

paradox-01
Member

Re: Oni Joint Story, First Installment: Salvation

(I hope it makes sense to you.)

Coming down from the mountains, Mai reached a lone dusty street and roamed along its side waiting for a car. Finally a truck stopped and a door was opening. She jumped in and thanked.
The driver punched the dashboard. "Shut up." He quickly turned to Mai. "Err... Not you. He's just complaining again."

    "That's wrong?"

The truck started to move again. "The board computer noticed my unplanned stop."

    "Does that mean trouble?"

The man typed something on a data pad. "No, we are still in schedule. There's my usual 15 min buffer..."

"Sometimes I have the feeling my boss worries more about this machine than about me. But you can't do this job for long if you don't like it."

    "I wonder... How's it in this can ?"

"A comfortable can. It looks worse than it is. With time you're getting used to it. -- These seats are extra-backbone-friendly. Right behind is the coffee machine."

"We are allowed to customize truck's habitation area for some degree so I brought my own."

    "You're really a long time on tracks."

"Yes. In a few years we'll come replaced by fully autonomic board computers. Our kind is also dying species."

    "I hope it won't happen too soon..."

"It can't be stopped. Only long-experienced drivers are still employed. I think we are the the last generation."

    "Don't remind me. Better tell me more about your customized truck." A wry smile passed Mai's lips.

"There's not much left. I can listen to radio, and watch TV during wastelands routs. Thousands of kilometers are just a bit too boring. My bunk is also in

the back zone."

    "Do you really stop in the wasteland to sleep?"

"Hm... No, but don't tell everyone. Okay?"

    "Do you actually drive?"

"Only when it is necessary .. or when I'm bored. Like I said before: the comp will drive in future. I guess I justify my payment with also doing maintaince of electronics, engine and other stuff in here."

Mai leant against her headrest pad.

"Tired?"

    "Hm."

"You can rest in the bunk if you want. The next town is still 300 km away.

    "I only need to reach next ACC's sphere of action. -- Thanks again."

----

Some shakes made her wake up again.

Mai was staggering into the driver's cabin, rubbed her eyes. "Ah, the city lights. We're almost there."

"Don't slept good or why you're up so soon again?"

    "Yes, time lately was hard. I must some real rest."

"We are always forced to do things we would actually not do..."

    "Yea, no way 'round."

"Well then, how about a coffee? The thermos bottle is at the right, just open the green fold-out compartment."

Mai took off the metallic head and poured in a good shot.

She looked out of the window. They were passing the mountains, last rain fall had washed off much soil and made it flow onto the street, thus the shakes.

"Yea... So what was you doing here outside? You know, the air is poison and stuff..."

    Mai took another nip. "Good question."

"Can't tell me?"

Mai lowered her eyes. He hit the nail.

"Forget it, just tell me story."

    "A story?"

"Seriously, I've a young daughter and at these rare days when I'm home she likes listening stories before sleep." He bent over to the right, took a photo.

"Here."

    Mai saw at it for a moment. "Looks like a nice little girl."

"Yea, I hope she won't get into puberty too soon." He laughed again. Mai gave back the photo.

    "Uhm, well, I could tell you one my uncle told me."

"Sure."

    "In ancient time, there were powerful ghosts. They were fallen soldiers, punished to spend time between the worlds of human and dead. They had been actual good-minded people, had family, loved their children, lived usually in civil manner, but as soldiers they thought to have injure and kill others when been commanded to war. In their final judgment they were ordered to becomes hell's hunters and gate keepers. Their skin color changed between red and blue. Their tasks were eternal. Only remorse for their doings could free them. Some seemed to had lost their minds in endless hunting and guarding, and transformed into darker shadows of themselves. Those misused their power, terrorized and slaughtered innocent people. That marked them all as demon and devils."

"Hey, that's a quite short story."

    "I'm sorry. I don't know how it continues. At that point my uncle became interrupted. -- But I guess they want regaining their old status. Because in our time there are still Oni leading parades to fight back misfortune, greater evils, you know."

They passed a sign saying "You entered ACC save zone".

"Well, okay, over there is a service station. I let you out there. -- Hopefully we meet again. Maybe you can get the second part and tell me."

    "Oh, that could became difficult."

"You never know..."

He shut the door again and waved hand with a smiling. Then he drove down the street.

     "No, I meant..." She sighed. "Oh well, let's go on."

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#18 20/8/09 6:28

love_Oni
Member

Re: Oni Joint Story, First Installment: Salvation

Well what a interesting story. Your story has the calm atmosphere that matches with Leus' story. But your story has more dialogues. The conversation between Mai and the thug (I think he is the driver) is the thing that I find most interesting.


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#19 13/9/09 22:18

Samer
Member

Re: Oni Joint Story, First Installment: Salvation

ok I like it ! I'm writing the next part big_smile I already have it in my mind ^_^


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#20 14/9/09 3:27

Samer
Member

Re: Oni Joint Story, First Installment: Salvation

as she walked through this safe zone she realized that hope for humanity hasn't all gone yet ...
people were walking around with their kids ... the street lights shone down on her face ... and since a long time she felt calm and peaceful ...
she saw a little motel down the street ... and rented a little room with what money she had left ... she wasn't tired however she was still feeling energized ... in her mind she kept playing the fight with muro ... million thoughts rushed into her head ... shinitama, griffin ... but one big question remained : Now what ? ... what will become of her ... what will become of the world ...

she laid her head on the pillow and closed her eyes ... and surrendered to sleep ...

"she's in there" a loud voice said which woke her up suddenly ...
the door was being unlocked ...  immediately she stood up ready for battle ... the door opened ...it was still  very dark outside ... 2 black ops came in followed by a man she left for dead hours ago ... she couldn't believe her eyes ... Griffin had survived !

"We need to talk" ...
"U're .... U're alive !!! ... how ?! "
"That is irrelevant at this moment ...we need to go somewhere else ...we are not safe here ... "

"I'm not going anywhere with u !! not before i get some answers !

" fine but make it quick we are in great danger "

"I think I can handle myself ... how did u survive ... the explosion ... the battle ..."

" I did what I had to do " he said looking down

"what ?" ...  suddenly it hit her ... this man wasn't bruised, he didn't even have a scar ...
"Oh my God ! u have implanted a crysallis in urself haven't u ! "

"You didn't think I'd go to fight muro unprepared ... I had to be prepared for failure ... it was the only way ... the TCTF scientist managed to create a crysallis ..."

now please Mai we have to move ! as he said that screams and bullets were heard outside ... one of TCTF officers said " sir sir they're her ... we have 2 agents down ... we need to move !
"now would u listen to me Mai ! is there another way out !"  Griffin said

"Yes ... yes the window who are they !! the syndicate !? " she said as the were fleeing for the window and the sound of bullets was getting closer ...

"no ... much worse ... they're The BGI "

out of the window and into the back alley they ran ...

2 men in black intercepted their path .. they were carrying guns konoko have never seen before ! ... HIDE !! yelled  Griffin ... as the man in black shot a rocket towards them !
griffin and konoko both jumped out of the way at the right time ... unfortunately the tctff officers weren't as lucky ! ... konoko ran towards the armed man jump flipped and knocked his weapon out as griffin took down the other with his pistol ...

follow me ... griffin said we have a tctf truck near ... they ran thru the night ... as the BGI chased them furiously ... finally they reached the well hid truck ...
"Now what ?" konoko said ... " now we hide" he answered ...


they drove away ... no one was following them ....
konoko sighed a sigh of relief ... as she looked at griffin ... now are u going to tell me what's GOING ON !!

these are the BGI they are responsible for everything ... they've forced me to implant the chrysallis in u ... I had no choice

"Oh please there's always a choice !"
" No there wasn't ... not for me ... it was either u .... or ... him"
"him ?"
"Casey .... my son "
"U have a son !" I never knew that !
no one did i was trying to keep him safe .. I failed they kidnapped him ... I was forced to ... I couldn't let them do that to my son ... I'm sorry that doesn't justify what I did to u ...but but ...he's my son !" he said with a chocked up voice and teary eyes ...

Konoko was startled by the sight of her foe this strong man being emotional a side of him she never realized existed ...

"where is he now" she said  " I don't know ...they still have him ... they had him for years ... i was allowed to see him every once and a while to make sure he's still safe ... and they promised he would remain safe as long as I do their bidding ...

"poisoning the atmosphere ... did they have anything to do with it ?"
"I'm not sure ... but they could benefit from it ... by selling chrysallis .. creating their own army of mutants ... so no one could stand in their way ... "

"so we are all doomed ..." konoko said

" not necessarily ... there is a way still ... a person who can help us ... u've met him actually"

"I've met him ? "  yes ... u know him by the name ... MUKADE

konoko's jaw dropped "U must be kidding me ! he's a murderer !"

" he wasn't always ... mukade was a colleague of ur father and uncle ... while their research focused on using the chrysalis to be implanted in a host .. his research was to use the chrysalis as an absorbent ... the same way it is able to absorb damage and regenerate the host's cells ... he hoped to be able to absorb toxins from air or water by using the chrysalis ... "

"u lost me ! and how did he become the super bad ass ninja "
"The BGI didn't like his work ... they kidnapped him and used him for early experiments of the chrysalis ... he changed ... he lost his family he lost himself and became a soulless slave for them ... " it will all come become clearer ... once we find him "

"mm ok one little problem though, I killed him !"

Griffin smiled and said "that's what u think ... funny thing about us chrysalis symbiotes ...we don't stay dead for long ...

Last edited by Samer (14/9/09 15:49)


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#21 14/9/09 9:33

Leus
Member

Re: Oni Joint Story, First Installment: Salvation

(Awesome.  I dig the interest this is getting.  If I think of a good way to continue it I'll let you guys know, but otherwise anyone else should feel free to write the next part for the time being.)


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#22 14/9/09 14:43

Mukade
Member

Re: Oni Joint Story, First Installment: Salvation

(hey, i'd be interested in writing, so far, its looking pretty good... 'm glad someone else besides me brought Mukade back into the picture smile  i may takea  little while, im interested in writing, but i just need to think of a direction. on a note, this may be too early on, but later in the story, i suggest we try to extrapolate on the bond between Mukade and Mai, clrealy its something different, there was no bond between Barabas, or Muro... and now griffen. I saw that one coming as soon as i read he was alive  big_smile )

Last edited by Mukade (14/9/09 14:44)


"He looks mean enough to tear my arm off and beat me to death with it. In fact, he looks mean enough to tear his OWN arm off and beat me to death with it."

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#23 14/9/09 14:54

Samer
Member

Re: Oni Joint Story, First Installment: Salvation

yay m glad u liked it big_smile

the direction I had in mind was they find mukade he later helps them after a big heart speech and a fight with konoko tongue they fight the BGI the 3 together i don't know how or the outcome ... maybe mutant muro comes back ... I had a scene in mind... konoko fights muro and realizes she can't defeat him so she tries to entrap him somewhere and stay there fighting him for eternity ... but mukade teleports her and takes her place .. thus making redemption for all his crimes ... and well something ^_^


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#24 14/9/09 15:20

Mukade
Member

Re: Oni Joint Story, First Installment: Salvation

Mai lay on the cold stone floor. She couldn't sleep, the events of the past few weeks bore on her mind, now that she had lost her momentum in the aftermath. There were too many things crowding her mind. Griffen's son, her ex-boss with a chrysalis. The BGI. The disaster she had caused with the destruction of the atmosphere processers. Mukade alive, and the realization struck her that, if Mukade were alive then so must Barabas, after all, Mukade's chrysalis was an earlier prototype of Barabas'. And the biggest mystery of all... Kerr's words ringing in her head. (Sry Leus, don't know where your headed with this big_smile )
     
       The conditions of their surrondings didn't help matters either. They had found a cave a fair distance out of the ACC zone, trusting their chrysali to keep them safe. Here, Mai and Griffen figured, they wouldbe safe from most any personel sent out after them, and any with equipment enough to survive the conditons would still have trouble tracking them, the cave was fairly remote.

        Griffen lay about 5 yards away from her. Judging by his breathing, she figured that he was still awake. She assumed the same things on her mind weighed also on his. Yeta nother sign of his other side, the human side, and not the stiff official, disciplined side that would be able to control his thoughts and allow him sleep. Through the mouth of the cave, the sky had begun to turn a soft shade of grey. Dawn. They weren't going to accomplish much by lying there, especially rest. Anyways, a little activity might even take her mind off things.

      Rising, she picked up a grape sized pebble and toss it at Griffen's head. It found t's mark, but Griffen didn't even flinch.

   "A tap on the shoulder would've sufficed"

     He got up as well, Mai just smiled at him. As Griffen bent down to tie his shoes, Mai landed a precise kick that should have taken the older man off his feet. Instead, he used the momentum to propel him into a roll and came up facing her.

    "You really want to do this?"

    "I need to know that you won't slow me down"

    Griffen merley grunted and sank into a ready stance.  Mai didn't even wait for an opening to present itself, she charged in, intending to teach him a lesson or two with a couple of tricks she'd picked up along her way over the past couple weeks. None of the opponents she had faced, with the exception of chrysalis infused opponents had mereted thought on how to best them. Several pace away, Konoko lept into the air, an impossible jump for any normal human being. At the climax of her leap, she did a mid air flip, intending to come down feet first onto Griffen. At the last moment he side-stepped, wrapped an arm around her legs, and pulled. This unexpected move almost made Mais face best friend with the solid floor, but she brought her arms up at the last second and averted the impact, but it still jarred he body and scraped her palms up.

   "You're faster then you look"

   "You don't think i made it to director of the TCTF by being weak did you girl?"

   "Well, those days of sitting behind a desk would tend to soften a man, when i saw you climb from that copter with armor on, I thought you were dead meat"

    "I didn't start out as director, and now with this chrysalis inside me, i feel like a supercharged teenager"

    He grinned, a cold, sarcastic grin, but a grin nonetheless. She hadn't seen him smile since... ever?

   "Cmon, we've got to move, we may be in a remote place, but there are ways to track us."

   "Agreed. I can't wait to find another cold stone floor to sleep on."

   Griffen said nothing. Together they walked out of the cave and began to continue their treck. How long would they be on the run, Mai wondered.


"He looks mean enough to tear my arm off and beat me to death with it. In fact, he looks mean enough to tear his OWN arm off and beat me to death with it."

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#25 14/9/09 15:21

Mukade
Member

Re: Oni Joint Story, First Installment: Salvation

@ Samoko, yeah i could see a few of those things happening.


"He looks mean enough to tear my arm off and beat me to death with it. In fact, he looks mean enough to tear his OWN arm off and beat me to death with it."

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